Name: Yaeren
Alias: Yahoo
Age: 14
Eyes: Brown
Hair: Light Brown
Birthday: Nov. 19
Star Sign: Scorpio
Nationality: Mexican
Bishounen: Li Syaoran
Anime: Cardcaptors
Layout ©
Shini-Chan
Site © Yaeren
OK hi yes i am very hyperish right now and happy. I don't know why maybe it's cause of the chocolate i ate.
Ok well on friday i had swim practice and as i was leavign josh said bye to me (he was by his car i was on the side walk.) and he said "See ya later Yaeren." or soemthign like that i don't remebr but that seems like a big step for him considering he hates me! well yah
Weekend sucky we went to caborca i gues sit was "OKAY!" but not the greatest thing! School was kinda ok i guess, everybody whent on a fieldtrip. I was stuck wiht all the trouble makers nto that bad i guess, i think i got in trouble with MAx. He doesn't likeme much, david was like touching my upper thigh! very awkward! Then WHen mario came yah i was fighitng for htis ticket and he had his arms rapped around me, and well yah, *spazzy* but he doen't like me that way, atleast i dont think he does, and me and eddie bridge to the friendship stage of kssing on the cheek! Yay! i guess, lauren is gonna me so dead jealous but she can't do anythign cause she's goign out joseph! :P yah! and OMG :O! i think i witness i a miracle today. Willie Armenta was crying today on the bus! Ok he was like literally leaking his shirt was socking, and i got to talk to him, give him a hug, touch him! OMG i was shocked 1st by the fact that he was cryign and 2nd by the fact he didnt' hurt me! He was like a little kid. i was touched at 1st but yah! WOw i guess miracles do happen! * i must remember this day* (willie has pretty eyes) anyways yah moving on.
Swimming today was very good. It took me a while to go in the pool. I almost got Josh and Manny wet, but they are whimps. Josh seemed surpsingly talkitive today. I dance in the water! :P Yah can't do poolboys! They suck. Josh dunk me. Not Cool! i was yelling across the pool, and josh was untie - ing some lane lines! (he's pretty good at swiming quickly and quietly) and the before i know it i feel being pushed down quickly like quick sand. So I close my mouth not grabbing any air, and i stay down there for a while, i thought about pulling josh down too, but, he was probably all ready gone!, and i couldn't see i didn't wanna open my eyes for fear that i might see something disturbing so i let out what little air i had and slowly came out! No ones heavy in the water when josh pushed me i was in the deep end, obiesly, and i thitnk feel preasure i guess cause i had nothign to resists and you just go right under when your in the water.(I wonder if Mario and Alex or toher peopel will go swimming just for fun. I wonder who i like?) Anyways and then the towel incident. Because it is cold. Today he handed it to me and i couldn't open it so i freaked droppped it and jumped in the pool! It was cold very cold! But I guess it was sweet of him for trying, though, wonder if he's starting to like me? Nahh bearly tryign not to totally hate me. He kinda did get cute. And i liked his shirt today! Very cool, His hair cut is cute too, haven't checked out his body but seems to be hot but yah, And NO i am not stsrtign to like him! I'm not going to go trhough the same thign again.
What i hate is that People like Ashley Naff get everythign! Guys like her, she popular, rich family! I mean Dakota hates me, but hugs Ashley real nice. Ashley's a poser though, She's got a perfect Family what i wouldn't give to have a family like that. She is so self centered and always wants sympathy. Punk is not her style. She's kinda of a follower and sometimes doesn't have a clue or gets things. She thinks she's not pefect at all i don't think she has somethign that inperfect about her! Such a bitch. She's toooo too too nice. i feel sorry for her cause not a lot of people like her much. Always gets excellent grades, very irrated. People always notice her. Most people never insult her face on, or make funof her "frame" they way they do to me. Wow why do i show such sudden hate for ashley? This is scary!
I wonder if people talk about me the way i hear people talk about ashley, lauren, ect? They proabbly do, but i'll never know.
*sigh* i think i like to many guys its kinda frustrating! Hmm i also wonder why stevie dislikes me sooo much. Alec probably doesn't like me that much etheir. I wonder if anyone reads this? I ownder what the popular people say about me. Probably nothing, i'm just aspeck of dirt? Why am i so self concerend right now! I'm freaken my self out!
Am i weard? Crazy? Insane? Or just diffrent? What woudl i be liked if i was a normal person?
What else was i gonna write, i think this is it! This is a very weird post! i'm a bit shocked? wow! I'll post more if i forget something.
People talk about htis issue that i'm not ready to tell yet, i normally keep quite, people suspect of me but they have no proof, well atleast not alot. i wonder how long i can hide his?
These is just extra things that have happened to me.
Well i can't eat anything thats wrapped (candy, chips, donuts ect) BAD BAD BAD experince when we went to the band concert.
I think I like Rey, I dont' think i make it seem awkward but Max found out o'well. Who cares, it's not like Rey's gonna like me back, he's not the kind of guy that likes a girl like me. So yah
People are starting to think that i'm "hot" or "pretty" GAG!! i think i'm gonna puke. i refuse to belive this! And even **if** it a bit true, maybe guys i like will like me too.
I wonder if i can pull off teh Punk girl style. Would i be a poser if s tried? Am i gonna need an attitude to go with it? in a way i wanna change and in a way i don't. I liek my friends, Waldo (Jenica) Nessa (Vannessa) Nikky (Monique) Jenny and yah but i'd like to hang out wiht teh popualrs only cause they have the cute guys, and they get whatver they want.
I need to come up with bettr come back so far i'm getting pretty good at them
Hmm ok out of truth and dare, i'vehad to kiss only two guys sofar on the lips, i think i liked Jose's better than Dakota i don't know why, I mean Dakota is alot cuter!
Well swimming starter, Josh they boy I use to like, (not sure of i still do) was there. I think it was my 3rd practice on Monday well Josh and I haven't spoken to each other, awkward enough yes but i guess it's ok. Missy said he was shyer than usual, cause he likes me. Yah right, he talks shit about me and proabbly hates me too but o'well thats life. I really don't care, if he has a problem with me then he can just deal with it. But yah (he got braces ohh how i wish to laugh and make fun of him. But i must follow my code. *sigh*) Well on Monday it was *REALLY* really, really really cold. (Carol called me Yahoo during practice it was weird it wasliek the 1st time she calls me Yahoo, i guess i'm use to only certain friends calling me Yahoo.) Well anywasy i didn't want to get otu cause i had to walk for my towel, but i knew no one would get it for me so i was working up the courage to get out then Josh comes over he has my towel in his hand and tell me to get out before he dropps it in the water. I was flattered at first but then disturbed. I got out and i don't remebred if i tahnked him but yah. I think that was the 1st time he spoke me. And i don't remeber if i spoke to him.
Yah I felt strange I guess i was happy because he noticed me but what he said, made my happyness fade. I've heard how he talks about me when i'm not around, at first it hurts but then i just get angry or upset, but know i REALLY don't give a damn! I guess i'm growing up. We'll see how practice goes on Friday!
WOW i havent written in this thing in a LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG time. Well yah, i joined wrestleling. (sp?) It's cool i guess a bit unfair, the other girl that join she doesn't know alot and she gets to be on A team, and go to all the meets. I haven't wrestle yet, well atleast not in a meet only in practice. I've wrestled Xavi, no one saw us much everyone had left. I thought i did good, he's strong and heavy. Then I wrestled Stevie, he's like the champion of something. Yah i wretled him yesterday, i think i could of won if they could of given us more time. But he was only toying with me. He's good, i wish i had the potential to be better. Then i had the chance of going to a meet today but i couldn't cause i was a girl. Tough luck huh? Yah i kinda got mad at Stevie abit. I mean he's really quiet in class in stuff but in wrestleing he looked like a jerk, But what do i know i'm a girl. No guy talks to me just to talk. It use to be nice when i was the only girl. But now we got to managers and and another girl.
I can't sit with ANY guy on the bus. Coach says he trust me but those are the rules. I didnt'see that rule written dowm. I didn't argue with him though didn't find the point in it. Not being able to be treated liek everyone else makes me feel discriminated. It's not fair, my father should of never gotten a new job i should of stayed in El Paso, become a cheerleader or something, maybe co-captain of the dance team.
Weston asked me out. He's cute and evrything but it feels just weird goign out with him, don't know why, maybe cause were really good friends or cause i liek his family, don't really think of him as a boyfreind kind of thing. Then Ricardo asked me out too, he's sweet but no. Chayne told me that he liked me, he's cute and sweet. but all of my friends tell me to look at who he hangs out with. Why can't any guy i like ask me out? Guess faerie tales don't excist after all. They guys i like don't like me and i don't know why. If it is cause of my looks then forget it, my mom has never boughten me a shirt that more $5. I only have 3 pair of jeans 2 of them wich don't fit one of them i've hand since grade school.
I wasn't a quinceñera, to feel normall but to my luck i'm a little poor girl. Can't aford a party like that and my mom wont give me one. Just cause she didn't like hers when she had one doesn't mean i wont like mine. My mom rather buy me a car, I hate it when she makes promises she can't keep.
Well i think this is all i'll probbaly write more later or tommorow i still have to write to jenny in the notebook AND in the story. so yah tahh for now!
Okay have choir for a class, and at 1st it was fun my 3 best freinds where there and we where a small group. But now i am FED!!! up there are about 10 - 12 (that word that rymes with witchy) girls. And at 1st i was okay with it, they talked alot shared secrets worried about lipgloss and all that stuff i didn't care. Till now that i got isolated with them. They're like plastic dolls that wont shut up. They are very mean to if someone messes up singing they start laughing at them. Always late. They push most of us around. They think they are so good its getting on my nerves. i've tried talkign to the teacher but she says don't worry about it and all that junk. Practically i am very close to giving one of them a bloody nose or telling them off. My best friend Jenica says i should since #1 i am stuck with the and # 2 she doesn't liek them (most peopel don't) Naturally i am not that kind of person i usually shut up and deal with it but this is too much. i've talked to my parents they said they could change me out of that class but i really don't wanna go back to homebase.
Okay Sean, Seanis a boy i met at camp, and i guess i sorta liked him i dont'knwo i guess i was jealouse cause evry otehr girl had a b/f or soemthign liek it or i felt bad cause anoterh guy i liked didn;'t liek me he likes my roommate. What ever point was that i promised myself i would liek anyone because it wouldn't matter in 3 weeks we were all gone and out of there. But then ....... i was such an idiot, i fell for this guy the last DAY! i don't know why i guess cause he told me things i never heard that make me feel special. That and i misses Josh my real crush, the guy i liked since 6th grade.
**He is on the swimteam with me and i like him ALOT, he made my summer crazy yet again i love being with him holding his hand, spending time with him. I thinkhe likes me not sure. but anyways**
Pint is me and Sean got sorta kinda toghethere, but he live sin L.A. and me here in A.Z. So yah at first it was nice thinking abotu him and him complementing me ......... but after a while i got fed up wiht it he was saying thinfs he saw in me, he didnt knew me at all. I feel more special when someone tells me i am amzing for hadling school homeowkr sports and extra curiculare activities then when sone one says i'm special. I liek it better when my friend tony tells me i am a good friend or and awsome person, then Sean saying i am the prettyiest girl he has ever met. ANd now with school soccer swimming band gymnastics choir stuco yearbook, honors lagebra, honors english and hoemwork i bearly have time to talkon the phone never the less talk to SEan and i asked for him to forget me that iot wouldn;t workout and he got mad at me all i did was tell him teh truth.... guess i never reallyt liked him i WILL alwasy liek josh alot. i guess Sean was somethign unessery. he forgot me so i should forget him not liek i already did i liek my life just the way it is with my friends *wich are to many to name btw* my parents my teh people i LOVE! *cough* jenny steff *cough* *cough* sports evrything is as good as it will ever be i guess i don't need him why should i i don't need a guy telling me i am beatiful i know i already ia m i have alwasy been beatiful, that all that mattrs is what i think and do.
Okay well today my friend David told me somethign that kept me thinking. He said he thought soooo many times abotu me hating him, he also said you don't know what a person is when no one is around. But what surpiresed me the most if that he thought that i hate him. i don't i don't hate him at all sometimes i get annoyed by hima nd that what makes me act like i don't like him but that is nothign personal, i mean alot of poeple get on peoples nerves from time to time but that doesn't mean you hate them. He also asked me why i never liked anyone who liked me. He ment this cause he use to like me i'm not sure if he still does. But love or when you liek someone it doesn't work that way, when you like somone its ur heart who decides, you brain has no say in it. You heart will do anythign to be happy and gets what it whants no matter what nothing else is important. Wich is weird becaise you mind is the one with the common sense. And it is very hard for your mind to control your heart almost impossible, its tares you up. feeling lonely and cold msireable tortured by a feeling inside that you can't gte out no matter how hard you try! Anyways i can't say i;ve nveer thought abotu david likign me or him liking me. But i could never see myself goign out with him. I mean at 1st i thought it would okay but then i thoguht what would people say, i mean its david........... but then i thought no this isn't me i really truly don't really think what people think of me ask my friends. But then no matter how hard i couldn't picture us anymore i've known david too long he is a good friend someone i can tell almost anything too he is funny and makes me laugh i can talk to him about stupid stuff and laugh about them too. and now i think he hates me, no matter what i say or do it doesn't seemright to him. why ......... am i not goo enough for him, guess i am not at leat ot in his eyes but for me i am just find! i liek who i am and i am complety okay with it!
Okay well today was kind of a bummer i was sopouse to go to a camp reunion up in Phenoix for JHU CTY (John Hopkins Unerversity center of Talented Youth) but my ride bailed on me so i had to go to a soccer ceremony wich wasn't that bad. except it was like 117 degrees farenhite it was hot and well hot. My team mates keep stealing my ice beacause they were to lazy to bring their own. Then Ruthie that bitch she was begging for water even though she did still ALL of my water yesterday at the foot ball game! and she wouldn't let me have any, even though she did pay for my ticket that gives her no rihgt. Just cause i dithced her to see my other friends i hadn't seen in a long time. and half of them were missing but yah anyways i shoudln't be that mean. other than that i cam home talked on the phone and watched a bit of tv i have to clean my room i tink this is all for know see you guys soon byes